How to Ask More Interesting Questions
“I don’t ask hard questions. I ask honest questions.” – Krista Tibbet Being a therapist carries an occupational hazard of becoming allergic to small talk. Most of us can’t help … Read more
Relationships
Why We Lie (and What We’re Protecting)
My legs dangled from the wooden pew, periodically kicking the kneeler just to keep myself from melting into the hot boredom. It had been at least three hours, or so … Read more
Can we make marriage good for women?
Not long ago, Kristen Bell shared a post to celebrate her anniversary with Dax Shepherd. She wrote: “Happy 12th wedding anniversary to the man who once said to me: ‘I … Read more
Your Comprehensive Guide to the Enneagram in Therapy
Even if you have no clue what your Type is, you’ve probably at least heard of the Enneagram. Its popularity has surged in recent years, partly due the widespread hunger … Read more
Fact checking six popular pieces of relationship advice
Relationships are hard. Maybe the hardest of all human experiences, in fact, as they require us to confront all of the messiness of ourselves and another equally-messy-but-in-different-ways person. None of … Read more
We are terrible at endings, but we can get better
For a long time, whenever any friend would respond to my news of divorce with the concerned surprise I’d come to expect, I’d be quick to respond with some bumbling … Read more
5 Questions on Breaking Up with Gina Gomez
Several months ago, I had the idea to reach out to some of my very favorite authors, thinkers, and creators to ask them five questions about their work. It felt … Read more
I’m getting married again. Here’s what I’m doing differently.
I asked my partner the other night if he thought it was crazy that we were getting married given our first go-round (to other people) didn’t stick. Mind you, I … Read more
There’s beauty in the breakup
A few years ago I was standing in the dimly lit back room of a small bourbon bar. My high school was hosting an alumni event there, and a classmate … Read more
The ones who know our waves
I’ve been working my way through one of Ann Patchett’s beautiful books of essays lately and just finished the piece that the book is named after, These Precious Days. In it, … Read more
Has divorce become the feminist litmus test?
When my own marriage started to unravel and it was clear that we were starting down the path of divorce, my stomach would seize up when I thought about sharing … Read more
When the story needs rewritten
At least once or twice per year, in some holiday or other gathering of my parents, brothers, and sometimes extended family, my parents love to drop in one of their … Read more