There are mornings where I wake up and stumble into my kitchen for my morning coffee and the sight of dishes piled near the sink, half-baked crafts, open cabinets, and crumbs (oh, the crumbs!) all over the floor will make my whole body tense and sharpen, leaving anyone else who happens to be awake at risk of witnessing my fury. I’ve talked before about how and why women scientifically have a greater stress response to clutter, so I know I’m in good company in the agitation I feel.
However, I have to tell you, there are other mornings where I wake up and stumble into said kitchen – with all of the same crumbs and crafts – and seem to be able to ignore, or at least tolerate, the mess. On those mornings, the chaos doesn’t seem to have the same power to send me into a spiral, even if I’d much prefer a more orderly scene.
My husband likes to joke that he could never get bored with me because he’s married to a different person every day. Is it my ever evolving personality that accounts for my varied response to my kitchen? Is it a function of the quality of my sleep, hormones, or connection? Yes, yes, and yes?
Any and all of these things (and plenty of others) have a direct impact on our mood, and we recognize that the state of our mood can have a big impact on how reactive to people and situations in our environment. When I’m in a so-called better mood, the little things don’t get to me. That edgy text, pile of dirty clothes, and mounting to-do list all exist, but they don’t quite reach my “do something!” button. When I’m not, everything seems to come crashing through my non-existent filter and feel irritating and urgent.
When we think about this, we consider our anxiety or mood to be driving how our brain is processing the information around us. And that certainly is part of the story. But what if how we are processing the information around us is producing the emotional state. Perhaps it sounds like a small distinction, but I think it might be important to how we understand what’s happening inside of us – and how we might just be able to shift it when we need to.
I’ve spent a good amount of time in recent years thinking about this model, and I’m interested to share it with you to see what you think. I call it in my mind the Filter Theory, and while it might benefit from a more clever name, I think it holds up in explaining some of the experience of depression and anxiety.
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We already understand, via some fascinating neuroscience and the study of consciousness, that our minds can be considered filtering machines. Scientists theorize that one of the core functions of the human brain is to filter reality. They suggest that there is simply too much data in our moment by moment experience to possibly process it at all, and so our brains’ jobs are to sift through and not let us ‘see’ what isn’t relevant to us. Rather than seeing a static image of what’s in front of us – a shoe or my kitchen or even a human face – we see what our minds construct of it, the aspects that it considers important for survival. (If you want to go deeper into this, I talked more about how this works here.)
What this all translates to is the truth that we don’t actually see the world as it is, but rather we see the world as we are. This is true at the level of humans as a whole; for example, we as humans are lacking sensory perception for navigational direction, whereas some birds have a “compass” in their brains that responds to the earth’s magnetic pull. Our lack of sensory machinery doesn’t mean it’s not there – we just don’t perceive it.
It’s also true, though, at the level of us as individuals. What we perceive and what gets filtered in or out varies a lot by who we are and how we are feeling. Let’s get specific now about how this might apply to the experience of a depressed mood and anxiety.
When we feel overwhelmed and anxious, we might think about that as stemming from our filters being very open – perhaps far too open. In that state, it seems like we can’t help but perceive everything. Every unfinished task, every person who may be upset with us, every unmet need… it all seems omnipresent, either at the same time or in constant, quick succession.
In this state, our filters are wide and aren’t working to hold back what we may not actually need right now. Instead, not only is it all getting through, but everything that does get through is met with a sense of importance and urgency that may not actually be warranted. Anxiety, therefore, results not only from the wide open filter, but also from a bias toward seeing what gets through as a threat.
A depressed mood, on the other hand, might be thought of as a state in which the filters are far too narrowed. Very little can get through. If you’ve been in a significantly depressed state before, you can probably recall that everything tends to feel a dull shade of gray – the color and vibrancy of life can’t seem to pass through our closed filters. When we’re in this low emotional state, our narrowed filters make it hard to even notice things. The dishes pile up. Our partner’s kind gesture doesn’t register. Positive feedback doesn’t land. The gorgeous sunset goes unnoticed.
We might have a sense of what’s out there, that there are things to be happy about or grateful for, but they can’t seem to quite reach us. Alternative ways of thinking or feeling about things also don’t seem to make it through our filters. Even the best advice or most positive reframing is filtered out by a mind that’s stuck in a loop.
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As I’ve been conceptualizing this, I’ve found myself observing the model in action: the anxious open-filter spirals and the lonely closed-filter despair. I’ve also looked around at how this idea squares up to other ideas and functions of the brain.
One model I found that overlays closely to this Filter Theory is Barbara Fredrickson’s Broaden-and-Build Theory of emotions. Fredrickson points out that positive emotions, like joy, contentment, and interest, tend to broaden our attentional scope – even our visual field. When in positive emotions, we tend to see the forest for the trees. Negative emotions, like fear and anger, tend to do the opposite – keeping our focus tight and narrow. This is for good evolutionary reason: we have these emotions to propel us into action (fight or flight, for example), in which we need to be narrowly focused on survival.
What is happening biochemically to produce these changes in our perception? Some researchers think serotonin may be part of the picture. Most of us are familiar with serotonin as an important for a positive mood. But serotonin has also been associated with what we think of as the “explore” urge. A recent study showed that boosting serotonin in humans prompted them to expend more energy seeking out and gathering new information. It stands to reason that lower serotonin may inhibit the seeking of and increase the filtering of new and contradictory (e.g. everything’s not terrible!) information. Conversely, anxiety, trauma, and stress may be associated with higher serotonin.
And finally, the study of psychedelics may also lend support to the Filter Theory. One of the ways that we hypothesize psychedelics to help us in make positive shifts in mental health is that they temporarily disrupt the filtering mechanisms of our minds. When those filters are suppressed, we may actually see more of what is – including new ways of seeing ourselves and others. This may be one important way that ketamine, for example, helps to move people out of ruminative depressive loops. For those with high anxiety, these medicines might help provide a ‘reset’ on the filtering processes, letting us give greater attention to what’s important and feeling less threatened by the rest.
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Serotonin agents, like SSRIs, and medicinal psychedelics can certainly help some of us free ourselves from the limits of our under- or over-active filters, but there are other ways we can use this theory as well.
When we are finding ourselves over-stimulated and anxious because our filters are too wide, we can try out ways that help us narrow them.
- We might quite literally narrow our filters by restricting the information that gets through to us. We can turn off notifications on our devices, close out of social media, and set app limits on our email. Being less reachable and influenceable is core to reducing the cognitive overwhelm.
- It can help to let important people in our lives know that we are working on narrowing our filters, and so we might not be as responsive or need more time to get back to them. That can sometimes help us feel less compelled to keep our filters open.
- If certain information tends to flood our filters – whether that’s our email or looking at the laundry – we can schedule exposure versus letting it come to us at any time. Ideally that time is one in which our natural filters are strongest. That varies by person, but for many of us is earlier in the day.
- Beyond the amount of information, the other core experience of too-open filters is that we feel like everything is life-and-death. We can remind ourselves that we are not actually being chased by a tiger, despite what our minds might be having us believe. We can also use gentle questions to help us prioritize where to focus. These might include: Will this matter in five minutes, five months, or five years? Where is my energy most valuable right now? Where would this fall on the priority list of the person I most want to be?
When, on the other hand, we find that our filters are too closed, and it seems like little matters or it’s hard to see the good, we can practice strategies to widen. I wrote a whole essay on widening the lens that you might check out, but here are a few ideas of ways we can do this:
- We can literally widen our perspective by getting outside and looking out into the horizon. Research has demonstrated that panoramic vision – being able to look far into the distance with a wide perspective – is associated with calmness and the reduction of stress.
- We can journal from the perspective of our past self or future self. Talk about what you want for the present day version of you. Practices that pull our perspectives to different time points can remind us that the present is not all that there is.
- Do something – anything – new. This doesn’t need to be major. It could be taking a new route to work or watching a new series. Introducing novelty may not feel as natural if you are feeling low, but it can introduce newness and aliveness that could shake up our stuck filters.
It’s important to keep in mind that we might really need support in this process, especially if we are experiencing a more clinical depression or can’t seem to get out of our filtering loops. Engaging with a therapist can be really helpful in these times because they can help us see the ways to widen or narrow our filters when we can’t, or when we need some support or accountability to do so.
It also bears saying that while our efforts to keep our filters aligned can be part of our general mental health practice, even when we are working hard at it, there will be things that adjust them for us. Hormonal shifts are a big one, and can dramatically change the nature of our filters. New medicines or life changes can also recalibrate our filters. Our job is not to expect perfection, but to stay mindful of how we are being impacted and make adjustments in the ways that we can.
